Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Dilemma
(i was ninja status with the video i was pretending to be on the phone lol) I got the best of both worlds. A year ago all i wanted in my kitchen was a group of AChiO's. 6 months ago things started to change. I'm upstairs i sit today partial to both worlds and just looking to find that balance. I have a Final tommorow and whatever time i can scrape up id tend to spend with the Poet.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Ted and Jared.
Two Crazy event probably highlighted the news this last week. Two individuals are two i could learn alot from and want to discuss.
The first is Ted Williams
Golden Voice Ted Willams goes from Homeless Felon to internet Sensation who now is very employed
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How does somebody so gifted fall so hard? His recent viral sucess has his popularity SKYROCKETING. They say he is harder to get ahold of than the president himself.
I ask if he had this gift even 20 years ago before he fell under the poverty line, why did he not expose it then. I know he had a radio gig, why did he have to turn to Drugs/Alcohol when he knew he was heading in the right direction. I am trying to figure out the moment in time where you got off your radio show gig about 15 years ago and walked to your car about to go home to your family that you loved so much. Maybe you loved them as much as the drugs and when something sparked you turned to the drugs. Those drugs took you out of your wifes bed into the homeless shelter and on the streets. It took you 15 years but you claim to have found God in your life. God and YouTube have now put you in a movie role with Jack Nicholson and basically a household name. Probably the story intensified your popularity so much that i couldn't imagine you being as popular had you not turned to coke.
Personally I love what Youtube has done to the American Dream. It has brought everybody 15 minutes closer to their fifteen minutes of fame. You are an interesting piece and If i was you i would have been a bit more creative while i was homeless. If I was you, I would have stood outside of the sports bar and announced the football games play by play. Dont worry about my opinion though, I was Messing with your Destiny. A Happy Story hopefully, Mr Williams.
In other news,
The second is the Suspected Gunman in the Arizona Shootings Jared Lee Loughner,
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I know this man is insane, and this is just the ramblings of a nutjob. He is going to jail for the rest of his life, I mean, he murdered a federal judge and a 9 year old. that is unacceptable, and i dont care how much you hate the governement, you cant shoot at kids.
One Quote i will take from this is that
Less than 5% of americans are dreamers.
I guess somebody has a problem with the fact that the majority of people in this country dont dream. And the problem was so pressing, he decided to pull his gun out and shoot at a local congresswoman. On top of that a 9 Year old girl who "Ironically" was born on September 11th. September 11th 9 years ago. That represents a day that will forever be remembered by my generation. After watching this video i can tell that you hit schizophrenia. and it was confirmed by the news that your environment diddnt rile you up to do this. There is an imbalance within you, but how much can we blame that imbalance. What triggered you to pull the trigger?
The Colombine shooters were considered social outkasts, which really showcased the negative aspects and social importance of the High School Hierarchy. As a young indian in a white neighborhood i was forced to be SOMETHING besides myself (or the categorization portrayed by a skinny darkskinned curve-setting MIT candidate) There were consequences if nobody would hang out with you. It could drive you to shoot up the school. They knew what was coming to them but decided to take away lives in the process.
When I murmur Destiny I usually fantasize about the impending TI-83 outputs sent by God. It's a shame though, that i didn't pray this morning. Even if i diddnt formally acknowledge God, its a shame that i diddnt thank him for the opportunities. I still commit footprints but now that i actually write about it, its like almost unwelcomed. Isnt it weird when somebody says "Your welcome" without a pretext? I know servers at restaurants like to do this to be Smart-asses. Crazy.
So you had a problem with American currency, American police, literacy, and dreamers. You should have tried your luck somewhere else because now your life will be inanimate behind the prison cell. I certainly don't agree with much of what is going on, and with the power of organization, i can side with those that want to change it. Sometimes I want to blind myself from things that are so irrefutable. The Patriot Act has basically let the government in on any form of communication you have except possibly a face to face conversation in your bathroom and you have to both write on a piece of paper and make sure you don't have any windows in that bathroom. Sometimes you have to question what you see on TV when you know that PBS is the only non-commercial television network.
To see what is in front of one's nose needs a constant struggle. - George Orwell.
As much as I try to be factual, it seems i need to audit my thoughts. The child in you wants everything, and at that everything to be perfect. Who doesn't agree though. What's the point of having cake if you cant eat it. I do love this country. I really love America, the city upon a hill speech said in the 1600's is a story of promise, and provides parallels to explain the American Dream. Ultimately my dream. My Purpose has not changed and it will not. But how i go about it cannot be written down just once. I allow for flexibility. But the end result is carved into the stone.
What would I do if I lost my Cool. I'm Moving to Goa. You cant complain about anything over there. =]
The first is Ted Williams
Golden Voice Ted Willams goes from Homeless Felon to internet Sensation who now is very employed
">
How does somebody so gifted fall so hard? His recent viral sucess has his popularity SKYROCKETING. They say he is harder to get ahold of than the president himself.
I ask if he had this gift even 20 years ago before he fell under the poverty line, why did he not expose it then. I know he had a radio gig, why did he have to turn to Drugs/Alcohol when he knew he was heading in the right direction. I am trying to figure out the moment in time where you got off your radio show gig about 15 years ago and walked to your car about to go home to your family that you loved so much. Maybe you loved them as much as the drugs and when something sparked you turned to the drugs. Those drugs took you out of your wifes bed into the homeless shelter and on the streets. It took you 15 years but you claim to have found God in your life. God and YouTube have now put you in a movie role with Jack Nicholson and basically a household name. Probably the story intensified your popularity so much that i couldn't imagine you being as popular had you not turned to coke.
Personally I love what Youtube has done to the American Dream. It has brought everybody 15 minutes closer to their fifteen minutes of fame. You are an interesting piece and If i was you i would have been a bit more creative while i was homeless. If I was you, I would have stood outside of the sports bar and announced the football games play by play. Dont worry about my opinion though, I was Messing with your Destiny. A Happy Story hopefully, Mr Williams.
In other news,
The second is the Suspected Gunman in the Arizona Shootings Jared Lee Loughner,
">
I know this man is insane, and this is just the ramblings of a nutjob. He is going to jail for the rest of his life, I mean, he murdered a federal judge and a 9 year old. that is unacceptable, and i dont care how much you hate the governement, you cant shoot at kids.
One Quote i will take from this is that
Less than 5% of americans are dreamers.
I guess somebody has a problem with the fact that the majority of people in this country dont dream. And the problem was so pressing, he decided to pull his gun out and shoot at a local congresswoman. On top of that a 9 Year old girl who "Ironically" was born on September 11th. September 11th 9 years ago. That represents a day that will forever be remembered by my generation. After watching this video i can tell that you hit schizophrenia. and it was confirmed by the news that your environment diddnt rile you up to do this. There is an imbalance within you, but how much can we blame that imbalance. What triggered you to pull the trigger?
The Colombine shooters were considered social outkasts, which really showcased the negative aspects and social importance of the High School Hierarchy. As a young indian in a white neighborhood i was forced to be SOMETHING besides myself (or the categorization portrayed by a skinny darkskinned curve-setting MIT candidate) There were consequences if nobody would hang out with you. It could drive you to shoot up the school. They knew what was coming to them but decided to take away lives in the process.
When I murmur Destiny I usually fantasize about the impending TI-83 outputs sent by God. It's a shame though, that i didn't pray this morning. Even if i diddnt formally acknowledge God, its a shame that i diddnt thank him for the opportunities. I still commit footprints but now that i actually write about it, its like almost unwelcomed. Isnt it weird when somebody says "Your welcome" without a pretext? I know servers at restaurants like to do this to be Smart-asses. Crazy.
So you had a problem with American currency, American police, literacy, and dreamers. You should have tried your luck somewhere else because now your life will be inanimate behind the prison cell. I certainly don't agree with much of what is going on, and with the power of organization, i can side with those that want to change it. Sometimes I want to blind myself from things that are so irrefutable. The Patriot Act has basically let the government in on any form of communication you have except possibly a face to face conversation in your bathroom and you have to both write on a piece of paper and make sure you don't have any windows in that bathroom. Sometimes you have to question what you see on TV when you know that PBS is the only non-commercial television network.
To see what is in front of one's nose needs a constant struggle. - George Orwell.
As much as I try to be factual, it seems i need to audit my thoughts. The child in you wants everything, and at that everything to be perfect. Who doesn't agree though. What's the point of having cake if you cant eat it. I do love this country. I really love America, the city upon a hill speech said in the 1600's is a story of promise, and provides parallels to explain the American Dream. Ultimately my dream. My Purpose has not changed and it will not. But how i go about it cannot be written down just once. I allow for flexibility. But the end result is carved into the stone.
What would I do if I lost my Cool. I'm Moving to Goa. You cant complain about anything over there. =]
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Monday, January 3, 2011
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Lust for Life II
“The Difficulty lies, in finding out an exact Measure; but eat for Necessity, not Pleasure, for Lust knows not where Necessity ends.”-Benjamin Franklin
Danny Boyle’s Jamal is the young protagonist and his depicted journey is what inspired the name for this blog. My favorite review of it was done by “Time” magazine.
“Despite its elements of brutality, this is a buoyant hymn to life, and a movie to celebrate.” -Richard Corliss
I was thinking man. What is it going to take. For me to smile on my deathbed, with a similar lust for heaven, to look behind at my footprints, and describe my life to the tune of a buoyant hymn. Jamal knew it was not 20 million rupees on that game show. Overthinking the situation, I calculated that $436,020 on a game show would make for a great time, but there is something internally that would still need to be appeased. Danny Boyle’s pantomime within the last 15 minutes of the movie was sufficient to move your heart from the bottom to its culmination. That roller coaster ride which ended to the tune of A.R. Rahman would describe a life that I wouldn’t be prepared to lead. I’m just a weak American individual who grew up with too much money and no discipline. Enveloped was the description, the lust. “Buoyant hymn to life” is it too late for that? Am I too old to thrive? While Ialways Thank God for giving me what I have, sometimes I ask why was it given to me and not Jamal. Somebody so deserving. Why was I given both a Mother and Father, who served as training wheels to my bike. I can’t even ride the bike well and I’m damn sure I would lose in a race to those who learned the hard way. I can’t account for the last 21.5 years without trying to illustrate. Should I just move on, knowing that I had 3 square meals and a bed to sleep. I had the privilege of 2 younger brothers who filtered my clothes and shoes, who I could blame for fiascos, and who had my back. I cant explicate the great times and the wonderful friends without deciphering if they were necessary to my growth. And who is measuring this so called growth? Of the many biographical details that shaped President Barrack Obama. He explains in “Dreams From My Father” that none is more prominent that the absence of this father during his upbringing. It was difficult, more difficult than what I was placed on my pillow, but he attributed it to being good. Jamal, within the last 5 minutes of the movie, was certain of his destiny and accepted every defeat of the past as he knew the past never equaled the future.
Sometimes I just gotta step back from the microscope (I have annoying eyelashes that usually get in the way). Turn off the thermometer, take off my coat, but ill keep the pen. I need that to write and think really what this all means. I knew this domain name was like the keys to my tea laboratory. The keys lie in the same hanger, so I never lose them. This lab is a secret and I test and retest exclusively. Nobody disturbs me so I can keep my eyes where they need to be. I like it best to produce thoughts internally, though I draw from inspiration. I set up the rules only to hold them sacred to me. The unambiguous decision made to write was just to keep my mind sharp. Today that decision was necessary and I feel as I need every bit of my imagination to live.
I ask myself questions the same questions in greater detail in my 4th year of higher education. 2010 provided enough fodder to me to write volumes. I started this just to write nonsense, but this “Bullshit” serves as adequate provisions for my mind. I like to blog and things have not been the same. The reason I don’t write nearly enough as I am capable of is every word I right has an opportunity cost to itself. I’m trying to write the future, but the backstage deals done by producers attempt water down my stage show. I am chasing my dreams, and those happen to deal with human interaction and my lust to one day Love. There were a lot of great memories I will keep, but some of my widest smiles in 2010 came out of nowhere, when I was alone heart beating above normal and I am just looking at the floor. That’s what this blog did. I love helping people see their future, for betteror for worse. I believe there are many people who don’t know their happiness potential and continue to lead life at half of what they truly want. Giving up. I don’t say it in any measurement not relative. Im not speaking in any parameter. Not everybody’s goal is to make money and I feel shallow for even bringing up the subject, but it is true that humans were given a wide range of decision making power that they take for granted.
This may sound really dumb, but one day I was thinking about nature. A tree lives up to its potential. EVERY TREE. Every branch and every leaf comes out to perfection and it lives a life that is 100%. I have yet to see a tree just give up on itself. There is a certain merit I take from that and it allows my lust to grow. I have a certain lust for life, to make my environment better for me and anybody who has an open heart. Any opportunity for me to think and grow is appreciated. I have 99 problems and I can use some more because I don’t see them as problems anymore. Though this was explained in blogs prior, I cant get too high or low in any situation.
I just moved into a townhouse in the best part of town. The old me would be going nuts right now, the new me is fighting not to do it. The last 6 months living with mom were great, and I feel like this townhouse does more than redeem myself for whatever I was missing out on. The game plan when I moved back to Lake Forest was to study and don’t look at girls. As I got my grades back and I am not satisfied. I created an algorithm for my growth. It was identified and I relived stress by reading a book I didn’t think I would ever pick up. I stumbled into my winter break with nothing. I was laid off from a job and I got the weekend I wanted. I didn’t want it so soon and for the first time in many years, there was more ink in the marker than was on my calendar. Am I supposed to be happy about this? I am going back to Fullerton with a lust for Balance. I need a little bit of the old and mix it with the new. Im not a new years resolutions type, but there is a lot I have to sort out and keep it moving with what is working for me.
I'm motivated by this. This is what gets me most excited.
I met many people last year, including people who sought attention. I am beginning to understand this world and at this point nothing will come as surprise. Another individual was ready to stop utilizing her power to love as a result of not attracting similar emotions from the opposite sex. Another person lost his brother to a upcoming trial for murder. I met somebody that once attempted suicide, which excited my curiosity and commanded my attention. I keep thinking, what would lust me to the next life so prematurely? There are so many issues that we face, but they all lie powerless to issues abroad. Appreciation of life was my remedy. The other day my brother from Sigma Phi Epsilon lost his mother to the battle of cancer. He now lives without parents and I don’t know where he draws motivation. Many kids in India don’t make it to “Kaun Banega Crorepati”. I cant even explain what could being going through the minds of breathing children in Africa who have to taste the salt of tears. Their uncertainty is not an organic feeling to me.
The opportunity of life was given to me, and if I don’t make the most of its abundance, I would feel unfit to live. I already don’t feel like I deserve what I am getting, what’s worse is the hypocrite cant even face himself in his own blog. The problem is im on a path to make money. It made me real happy when I did get that internship, but it took a tole on my internal fire. I need to think outside of the box in order to make a fulfilling impact onto this planet.
I created this blog to simply scribe . Now I want to write my destiny. In the battle of free will and destiny I will try to have my say. Writing and doing are 2 things and I am always ashamed when I say something and don’t do it. I’m an accounting major and though that profession I want to be presented to as many people as I can. I want to be in their defense and help them lead lives with purpose. I hate quoting Minaj but
“Everybody Dies but not Everybody Lives.”
Forget me, because I have been too blessed. My family is beautiful and I will write about them later. I knew I was going to write about my lust for life because it is so real. I write because it will help me realize. Sometimes I need to step back and stop writing, look back and edit. I hate editing my blogs. I am not satisfied with any of them from the past, as I am the worst critic, but im happy that 2010 had many emotional timestamps and its there forever for my reference. History tends to repeat itself and I am about progression. This is my love story, but its not defined by the parameters of a male female relationship. I will say this. When the time comes, I will be ready for her, it could be tomorrow depending on the person, and I will never understand how spontaneously they could enter my life. I keep my eye out, but I will write, because when I find “it”, is when I find you.
To take every ounce of hate in my heart will take me where I need to go. After getting off the restaurant, the most important, and my favorite people in the world is anybody who is serving me. Gas station, retail store or restaurant, I feel you and I think so highly of you. I have my attitudes about restaurants, and honestly the restaurant business is not where I should be. It is hard to balance things especially if it involves ideals and money.
I stand here in 2011 more discomposed than I did exactly one year ago. I didn’t say it was a bad thing though. 2 brothers who are on the brink of young men, I need them to see what I am seeing, but I am afraid it won’t register. I used to do this for the beauty of my Macbook screen but little did I know that I was born to move in this direction.
On June 1st 1989 I was born a C-Section baby , The lust for life began as I thought outside the box.
Danny Boyle’s Jamal is the young protagonist and his depicted journey is what inspired the name for this blog. My favorite review of it was done by “Time” magazine.
“Despite its elements of brutality, this is a buoyant hymn to life, and a movie to celebrate.” -Richard Corliss
I was thinking man. What is it going to take. For me to smile on my deathbed, with a similar lust for heaven, to look behind at my footprints, and describe my life to the tune of a buoyant hymn. Jamal knew it was not 20 million rupees on that game show. Overthinking the situation, I calculated that $436,020 on a game show would make for a great time, but there is something internally that would still need to be appeased. Danny Boyle’s pantomime within the last 15 minutes of the movie was sufficient to move your heart from the bottom to its culmination. That roller coaster ride which ended to the tune of A.R. Rahman would describe a life that I wouldn’t be prepared to lead. I’m just a weak American individual who grew up with too much money and no discipline. Enveloped was the description, the lust. “Buoyant hymn to life” is it too late for that? Am I too old to thrive? While I
Sometimes I just gotta step back from the microscope (I have annoying eyelashes that usually get in the way). Turn off the thermometer, take off my coat, but ill keep the pen. I need that to write and think really what this all means. I knew this domain name was like the keys to my tea laboratory. The keys lie in the same hanger, so I never lose them. This lab is a secret and I test and retest exclusively. Nobody disturbs me so I can keep my eyes where they need to be. I like it best to produce thoughts internally, though I draw from inspiration. I set up the rules only to hold them sacred to me. The unambiguous decision made to write was just to keep my mind sharp. Today that decision was necessary and I feel as I need every bit of my imagination to live.
I ask myself questions the same questions in greater detail in my 4th year of higher education. 2010 provided enough fodder to me to write volumes. I started this just to write nonsense, but this “Bullshit” serves as adequate provisions for my mind. I like to blog and things have not been the same. The reason I don’t write nearly enough as I am capable of is every word I right has an opportunity cost to itself. I’m trying to write the future, but the backstage deals done by producers attempt water down my stage show. I am chasing my dreams, and those happen to deal with human interaction and my lust to one day Love. There were a lot of great memories I will keep, but some of my widest smiles in 2010 came out of nowhere, when I was alone heart beating above normal and I am just looking at the floor. That’s what this blog did. I love helping people see their future, for better
This may sound really dumb, but one day I was thinking about nature. A tree lives up to its potential. EVERY TREE. Every branch and every leaf comes out to perfection and it lives a life that is 100%. I have yet to see a tree just give up on itself. There is a certain merit I take from that and it allows my lust to grow. I have a certain lust for life, to make my environment better for me and anybody who has an open heart. Any opportunity for me to think and grow is appreciated. I have 99 problems and I can use some more because I don’t see them as problems anymore. Though this was explained in blogs prior, I cant get too high or low in any situation.
I just moved into a townhouse in the best part of town. The old me would be going nuts right now, the new me is fighting not to do it. The last 6 months living with mom were great, and I feel like this townhouse does more than redeem myself for whatever I was missing out on. The game plan when I moved back to Lake Forest was to study and don’t look at girls. As I got my grades back and I am not satisfied. I created an algorithm for my growth. It was identified and I relived stress by reading a book I didn’t think I would ever pick up. I stumbled into my winter break with nothing. I was laid off from a job and I got the weekend I wanted. I didn’t want it so soon and for the first time in many years, there was more ink in the marker than was on my calendar. Am I supposed to be happy about this? I am going back to Fullerton with a lust for Balance. I need a little bit of the old and mix it with the new. Im not a new years resolutions type, but there is a lot I have to sort out and keep it moving with what is working for me.
I'm motivated by this. This is what gets me most excited.
I met many people last year, including people who sought attention. I am beginning to understand this world and at this point nothing will come as surprise. Another individual was ready to stop utilizing her power to love as a result of not attracting similar emotions from the opposite sex. Another person lost his brother to a upcoming trial for murder. I met somebody that once attempted suicide, which excited my curiosity and commanded my attention. I keep thinking, what would lust me to the next life so prematurely? There are so many issues that we face, but they all lie powerless to issues abroad. Appreciation of life was my remedy. The other day my brother from Sigma Phi Epsilon lost his mother to the battle of cancer. He now lives without parents and I don’t know where he draws motivation. Many kids in India don’t make it to “Kaun Banega Crorepati”. I cant even explain what could being going through the minds of breathing children in Africa who have to taste the salt of tears. Their uncertainty is not an organic feeling to me.
The opportunity of life was given to me, and if I don’t make the most of its abundance, I would feel unfit to live. I already don’t feel like I deserve what I am getting, what’s worse is the hypocrite cant even face himself in his own blog. The problem is im on a path to make money. It made me real happy when I did get that internship, but it took a tole on my internal fire. I need to think outside of the box in order to make a fulfilling impact onto this planet.
I created this blog to simply scribe . Now I want to write my destiny. In the battle of free will and destiny I will try to have my say. Writing and doing are 2 things and I am always ashamed when I say something and don’t do it. I’m an accounting major and though that profession I want to be presented to as many people as I can. I want to be in their defense and help them lead lives with purpose. I hate quoting Minaj but
“Everybody Dies but not Everybody Lives.”
Forget me, because I have been too blessed. My family is beautiful and I will write about them later. I knew I was going to write about my lust for life because it is so real. I write because it will help me realize. Sometimes I need to step back and stop writing, look back and edit. I hate editing my blogs. I am not satisfied with any of them from the past, as I am the worst critic, but im happy that 2010 had many emotional timestamps and its there forever for my reference. History tends to repeat itself and I am about progression. This is my love story, but its not defined by the parameters of a male female relationship. I will say this. When the time comes, I will be ready for her, it could be tomorrow depending on the person, and I will never understand how spontaneously they could enter my life. I keep my eye out, but I will write, because when I find “it”, is when I find you.
To take every ounce of hate in my heart will take me where I need to go. After getting off the restaurant, the most important, and my favorite people in the world is anybody who is serving me. Gas station, retail store or restaurant, I feel you and I think so highly of you. I have my attitudes about restaurants, and honestly the restaurant business is not where I should be. It is hard to balance things especially if it involves ideals and money.
I stand here in 2011 more discomposed than I did exactly one year ago. I didn’t say it was a bad thing though. 2 brothers who are on the brink of young men, I need them to see what I am seeing, but I am afraid it won’t register. I used to do this for the beauty of my Macbook screen but little did I know that I was born to move in this direction.
On June 1st 1989 I was born a C-Section baby , The lust for life began as I thought outside the box.
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