Vision

It really sucks that i put down the greatest piece of literature ever created in exchange for the following quotation.

"Hunger defines me. I've always been hungry, but now my appetite has

risen to a new level. My will is greater than ever. The motivation to

succeed runs through me like blood. In this 10th year, my 10th season as

an NBA player, the mountain I once climbed to reach the top looms in

front of me again. I realize how hard it will be to climb it, how much I

will have to sacrifice and overcome to get to the top again, how many

people have told me I can't do it. But I savor that challenge. Feed off

of it. That challenge helps give me purpose and inspiration. It helps me

define life."

I couldnt quote or downsize that paragraph cuz as soon as i start i end up reading the whole thing. This is my hero Kobe Bryant talking to pretty much himself in an exclusive interview with Dime Magazine, about 4 seasons ago.

I thrust off of it. i feed off of the energy. I love it. Being challenged is something that i savor and cant do without. Summer has left me in the doldrums and i cant stand it. there is nothing for me to accomplish except going to the gym.

Today went something like this. (mondays a little better cuz everybody is off so i have a family day)

11:30 wake up. and lay down until.

12:30: breakfast

  2:00 lunch. wash the cars.

   5:00 Grocery shopping. Bought whole wheat bagels.

8:00: Gym time.

And the thing is i cant function, i cant do anything, im so anxious and waiting for next week so i can train myself intellectually. This time around its different. i want to explain and help you live vicarously through a mindset that will fashion alot similar to the above quote.

i have 14 more classes left. ill even list them cuz im that fuckin focused right now.

1. ISDS 361a
2. ISDS 361b
3. MGMT 339
4. Mgmt 340
5. Marketing 470
6.  Some random GE
7. Management 449 (capstone)
8. accounting
9. accounting
10. accounting
11. accounting
12. accounting
13. accounting
14. accounting.

Im going to take 2 this summer, 5 in the fall. 5 in the spring and 2 next summer. why am i talking about this right now, because i gotta stay on track and acutally have to APPLY to graduate 2 semester in advance. im in that position. Baby steps. And i guess it took one of those (push comes to shove) situations to get me focused on what i want to do in life. Getting this heavily accredited degree from a reputible business adminsistration puts me on line with employers, a raise in the g.p.a would be fantastic and i would say compulsory to get me on the fast track to the rest of my life. i cant wait to see the rest of my life. i cant wait to go back to that. I guess the stop in the dessert made me realize how good life was going before i fucked up. It was great. and as optimitically speaking as i can get i can say i wouldnt know where i was going to be going or even graduating for that matter if Push diddnt fuckin came to shove. you know. So now that i got stuff on paper, it helps me set myself up to win. I need perfect grades. Perfect grades. and i need to keep my contribution going. thats a given. its no biggie anymore. i just hate to hear people complain about juggling things in their life. cuz at times i couldnt think about my juggling cuz i had to steer the unicycle in the right direction. its not something i have against almost everybody i see every day, but it hits me so emotionally i cant but help bring up this line by JAY Z.

But really the fact is, we not in the same bracket

Not in the same league, don't shoot at the same baskets

Don't pay the same taxes, hang with the same bitches

So how am i in the way, what is it i'm missing?

Nigga i been missing, nigga i been gone

The shit that you just witnessed is the shit that i bin on

its cool, in fact i traded part of my social life for a life, and my social life ended up being so damn good that im afraid if i did have a weekend off i would get too crazy.

C's get degrees, but They dont get you into Graduate School. Thats where i wanna be. not MBA like 99 percent of the (unknown) percentile who go to grad school, but I want a JD or LLM. Thats right, Tax LAW. loopholes. representing my people. clients. litigation. seminars. im so down. As long as its not number crunching. And its going to be challenging as hell cuz now i gotta study for laundry list of  things

Lemme list them again.

1. C.P.A. 
2. LSAT
3. The (California?) State Bar
4. GMAT.

i used to channel my energy to make as many friends as i can, and its great, to be apart of as many events as i could. Greek week, culture show, a weeklong adventure in big bear sacrificing alot. I realized its great to see that, but the good people at the Gould Law School dont give a fuck that wrote a screenplay.  Going into my next semester. I cut my hair thinking that i spend about 20 mins a day doing it, and doing it at the right times, sometimes twice. i can do without that, and instead keep it short so i dont have to think twice bout going to the gym. Where i belong.

The gym.

My favorite place to channell this anger i get. this drive.  im getting bigger thats for sure. ask any body who hasnt seen me in a few months.

More later, im tired and will wake up to probably laze around again.